Effects of Curiosity
by NemesisFate
Summary: Fifth and last in the Effects series. Severus and Harry get away from their kids for a while... only to have more. HPSS slash.


Title: Effects of Curiosity

Author: Nemesis

Feedback: Of course! post a comment or email me at HP/SS

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Severus and Harry take a vacation away from the six kids (leaving all six with Molly). And of course, Severus' natural curiosity gets them in even more trouble.

"Damnit," Harry swore, balancing a three-year old Avidius on his hip.

"Language," Severus rebuked gently, playing with Serena on his lap.

"Sev'rus, I'm going bloody crazy here. Six of them. Six! And it's all your fault."

"You're damn lucky I haven't had the time to try to improve it again. With my luck, I would have probably gotten either you or me pregnant yet again."

Harry laughed. "That's all we need. More kids."

Severus put Serena down and glanced at Elena and Marc, who were putting together a 50-piece puzzle, laughing happily.

"Where's Sargon and Hyacinth?" Harry asked.

"In the other room. Sargon's playing with a mini Hogwarts Express, and Hyacinth is playing kitchen. Stupid Muggle game you brought home, by the way."

"It's not stupid," Harry answered defensively. They had had quite a few arguments over their kids.

"Never mind that," Severus replied. "I wanted to know if you wanted to go on vacation for two, three weeks."

"Right, and just who would we leave the kids with? We can't ask any one person to watch six kids."

"What about Molly? She raised seven, surely she can watch six."

"Yes, she raised seven. But when the youngest was three, the oldest was eight or nine. Our oldest is five and a half."

"So what? They know how to amuse themselves. They're in that Muggle daycare for most of the day anyway."

Harry nodded. "You're right. So, do _you_ want to ask her?"

"Why would I? She's your adoptive mother, after all. In heart, anyway."

Harry smiled. "You're right, yet again. I'll go ask her. Can you take Avidius?"

Severus took the young child from Harry and waved. "Have fun!" he called, laughing wickedly.

Harry flooed into the Burrow, looking around cautiously. Molly came out into the sitting room to greet whoever had entered. "Harry!" she yelled happily, enveloping him in a hug. "It's been a while since I've seen you."

She steered him into the kitchen and sat down with a cup of tea, handing one to Harry. "What brings you here?" she asked.

"Severus wants to take me on a little vacation." Harry sipped the hot tea carefully.

Molly smiled. "And you want me to watch your kids, am I right?"

Harry nodded, slightly ashamed.

Molly laughed. "I'd love to. Under one condition."

"Oh, dear," Harry answered jokingly. "This will terrible, I just _know_ it." They chuckled.

"You haven't asked anybody else yet, right?"

"Of course not!" Harry answered, taken aback.

"Then of course I'll do it. You and Severus need to have a little alone time."

"I'm just hoping that Severus doesn't get it into his head to fool around with more potions. Dear Merlin, the problems he's caused."

"Do you really call six kids problems?" Molly asked half-seriously.

"_You_ didn't have to take him into St. Mungo's twice and drag him down to Poppy all through his pregnancy," Harry answered. "Or put up with him during a pregnancy. Although that wasn't that big of a problem. My magic was a bit temperamental at the time. He shut up after the first magic spill. Quite wisely, too."

Molly chuckled. "That's a very you thing to say, Harry. When will you drop the kids off?"

"Severus hasn't told me when he wishes to go yet, so I can't give you a straight-forward answer. Summer vacation is starting in a few days, so probably around then. Now, all six of them go to a Muggle daycare during the day. They're there from seven to six on school days and nine to five on vacation days. It doesn't much matter what the kids say in daycare, the Muggles think that they all have active imaginations. We've forbidden them from enchanting any pictures or toys, since they've made whatever they've drawn come to life or such similar things. That would scare them. Although Severus does think that a little scare is in order, I'm not so sure."

"I'm surprised Severus let you put the kids into a Muggle daycare," Molly commented, sipping her tea.

Harry chuckled. "It was quite a fight we had. Basically, I wanted to know just what he thought we were going to do with them otherwise. He told me that house elves could take care of a child perfectly well. I told him no way in hell. He said that his sister could probably help out. I told him that's too much to ask from any one person, not to mention that I think kids should be around other kids. Finally he gave in. Elena and Marc are going to go to Muggle kindergarten at the end of this summer. They stop preschool at the end of July and have the entire August off. Needless to say, they're very excited about going to kindergarten. We've taught them how to read already, but they'll learn a lot of lessons in kindergarten we won't be able to teach them."

Molly laughed. "I can't believe you actually got Severus to cooperate."

Harry shrugged. "I have my ways."

Molly nodded. "I bet you do. Anything else I should know about the daycare?"

"I'll have to introduce you to the daycare attendants beforehand just so that you can pick them up without any difficulty. They'll probably assume you're either my wife, my sister, or my mother."

"But I _am_ your mother," Molly answered.

"Biological mother. You are my mother in everything else."

Molly smiled.

"In any case, they know both Severus and me, since I made sure that Severus could pick up the kids at any time. I didn't want any problems to occur."

"How do you go to the Muggle daycare?"

"Depends on the day. Sometimes Severus and I walk down to the Forbidden Forest and apparate there, then Floo home. Sometimes one of us Flooes to a nearby wizarding building and picks them up. I'll show you which building to Floo to. It's one of those Ministry buildings set up so that wizards can access many different places without having to know how to apparate."

"What do they know about you, Severus, and the kids?"

"They have no idea that the kids are literally ours. I.e., that we bore them. They can't wrap their minds around that. In the beginning, they thought that maybe we were brothers or friends, something platonic in any case. But when Marc and Elena kept calling both of us Daddy and such, they kinda caught on that we were married. They seemed to be okay with it. They think we're slightly insane for giving them such names, especially the boys. The girls' names they like, beautiful but simple. The boys' names… well, I can't say I disagree that strongly. I'm not sure I would've named them after the Romans if given the chance."

Molly sighed. "That is a very pure-blood thing do to, of course. Arthur and I never bothered. Bill, Charlie, Fred, George, and Ron. All simple names. Unlike your Marcus Aurelius, Sargon Saturninus Silvanus, and Avidius Cassius."

Harry chuckled. "Severus' names. Then again, Severus' name is insane as well."

Molly nodded. "Lucius Septimius Severus Alexander Caracalla Elagabalus Snape II," she recited with a sigh.

"I won't even bother asking how you knew his full name."

Molly chuckled. "It's in the Order records. I have access to them, seeing how I helped Albus keep everything in order."

Harry sighed. "I'd better get going. I'll owl you the second I find out when Severus wants to leave."

A week and a half later, Severus and Harry were standing in the doorway of the Burrow, their six kids already amusing themselves in the sitting room.

"Avidius hates orange juice, but Serena loves it," Harry continued. He and Severus had been going over last-minute details with Molly. "Elena and Marc love doing puzzles together, and they absolute hate getting help. Hyacinth loves to draw and animate her drawings. She has to be reminded every morning not to do that at daycare. Sargon loves to play with his toy Hogwarts Express. All of them love being outside. Serena is terrified of bumblebees, Avidius hates spiders, Elena loves to play with butterflies, and Hyacinth loves to draw flowers. All of them love stories. The younger four are terrified of monster stories…" Harry paused to take a deep breath.

Molly laughed. "Enough, Harry. I'll figure it all out. They're all active and talkative, they'll tell me what they want and don't want. You two go off and have fun. Merlin knows you two need a little personal time together."

Severus chuckled. "See, love, I told you that Molly would be able to handle it."

Harry smiled. "I know," he answered, looking lovingly at his husband. "But I can't help but worry. They _are_ our kids, you do know that?"

Severus laughed, a rich, warm sound. "Indeed. I distinctly remember carrying two of them and listening to you bitch while carrying four."

"You try carrying four!" Harry retorted.

Molly chuckled. "You two get out of here. You can argue all the way to wherever it is you're going."

Smiling, Severus and Harry disapparated.

They dropped all of their supplies off in their hotel room, looking around. "It's very nice," Severus breathed in Harry's ear. Harry suppressed a shiver.

"Git," Harry answered fondly. "After all, you were the one who said you didn't want to go anywhere Muggle."

"How right I was," Severus murmured. "No magic, no…."

"Shut up," Harry answered lightly. "There's no magic, and it's nothing like Hogwarts, and our kids aren't here, but I am. And you are. And right now, that's all that's important."

Severus smiled. "You're right," he conceded. "And I, the terrible Slytherin that I am, am wrong. Misinformed. Stupid."

"Wrong and misinformed, yes. Stupid, never. Not my Severus."

"So now I am possessed?" Severus asked lightly, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, yes. You always were, my dearest Sev."

"Good to know. Give me a second or two to process that."

They laughed, reverting to their light, teasing ways before they had kids and commitments and everything.

"So, what would you say if I told you I fooled around with that potion again?" Severus asked.

"Oh, dear Merlin. Not _again_. What do you want to do, have _more_ kids?"

Severus frowned. "Now, you have to admit that they're all very cute and fun to be around."

"Yes, but six is more than enough."

"Come on, do you really think that I haven't managed perfect it yet?"

"Yes."

"Last try, I promise."

"Very well," Harry answered with a sigh. "You know perfectly well that I could never refuse you."

In retrospect, Harry decided that he should have most definitely said no. Because, of course, Severus _had_ managed to screw it up again.

This time making both of them pregnant.

"Dear Merlin, Severus, you really should stop fooling around with that damned potion of yours," Poppy sighed as she bustled around, doing various tests.

Severus sighed. "Are we both pregnant?" he asked.

Poppy nodded. "Afraid so. Harry's lucky this time – he's only carrying three. You, however, my dear friend, are carrying six."

"Nine more?" Harry asked, his emerald eyes darkening rapidly.

Poppy nodded again.

"Nine more?" Harry asked, turning to his husband. "You thought it fit to have _nine more!"_

"Oh, shit."

"NINE FUCKING MORE!"

"Harry, love, don't you love kids?" Severus pleaded.

"I do. But I never wanted to have fifteen. Never. I am never, ever, ever letting you fool around with that damn potion again. Merlin knows what you'll do next with it."

He got up and said goodbye to Poppy, storming out of the Infirmary.

"That could've gone better," Severus sighed.

"Dear Merlin, Severus, I don't know when you're going to learn. Harry's entirely right, you should've stopped fooling around with that potion on a long time ago."

"Nine in one go. Well done me," Severus answered wryly.

Eight and a half months later, all nine were born. Severus bore three boys and three girls, while Harry bore two girls and a boy.

"Very well," Harry said. "Names. Girls first, we can agree on those. How about Abigail?"

Severus nodded. "And what about Sarah and Ellen?"

"Sarah's okay, but not Ellen. We already have Elena."

"True, true."

"Alexys and Elizabeth?"

Severus nodded. "Beautiful. Jacqueline?"

Harry nodded. "And now the boys. What atrocities have you come up with?"

"Darius Augustus Octavius."

Harry nodded. "Okay."

"Cassius Execias."

Harry nodded again.

"Cicero Hadrian."

Harry shook his head. "Cicero as a middle name, maybe. Same goes for Hadrian."

"Fine, Solon Cicero Hadrian."

Harry nodded yet again.

"And Maximus Zephyr Scamandrius."

Harry nodded. "Merlin, you really do have this Roman name complex."

"I get it from my parents."

Harry smiled. "Where are the others?" he asked groggily.

"Don't you remember? Molly said she watched them while we gave birth to the next nine."

"Merlin bless Molly."

Severus nodded, trying to figure out exactly how they were going to get through the next few years. Fifteen kids, almost all of them under the age of five. It would be hell, that was for sure.

But they would manage. How could they not?

Fin


End file.
